Immediate pre-military events: I am 87 years old, an ordained minister of the Gospel endorsed by the Bible Chaplaincy of the IFCA International denomination.
My military experience began with enlistment in the National Guard of New Jersey, Troop C, 50th Armored Regiment while I was a student in high school. (1948). I rose in grade to that of corporal in two years. Leaving the state of New Jersey for undergraduate and then graduate work I resigned from the guard. I attended the Philadelphia Biblical University, (now Cairn University), received a B.A. from Columbia International University and entered divinity school. I was commissioned a second lieutenant, staff specialist in the Army reserves. Upon completion of seminary I entered active duty (June 1957) as a commissioned officer, first lieutenant, chaplain, attended Chaplain School, Fort Slocum, NY and assigned active duty in the Military District of Washington located at Ft Belvoir, Virginia. Some subsequent duties were; stockade, Woman’s Army Corp. unit, Engineer School, community, religious education and unit chaplain. During this period (1962-63) I was assigned to U.S. Army Polar Research in Greenland. Also during this period we faced the Cold War and crisis in Cuba. My attitude toward war was that I hated it, but believed it to be absolutely essential to our country’s survival. My ministry was to those men and women who prepared for war and fought in it.
The Cuban Crisis called for special emotional and moral preparations. Men were called up to active duty from all stations of life and experience over a short period and brought with them many skills and gifts. At Fort Belvoir where I was stationed at this time we were put on the highest state of alert and ready to move out on a twelve-hour notice. I was fixed with all my equipment and restricted to the Army Post.
There was the fear of immediate confrontation…
Separation from family and all familiars became a way of life in the military. When an opportunity of service to be the first chaplain with a Polar Research Engineer Group, which was to place an Atomic Power Package Plant out on 100 miles of the Greenland ice cap and build a unit called “City Under Ice” was given I took it. It was necessary to have two nine-month periods away from the U.S. and family and to serve with men. My duty was to provide for all the religious needs of the men regardless of beliefs or denomination and to serve as staff member to the commander. This was 1963 and 1964. Periods of isolation and feelings of being “cut off” from the rest of the world became prominent and were always present. Getting lost on the ice cap for one occasion for three days was traumatic for some ten of us in a Pole Cat track vehicle. Air transport was extremely dangerous and the chaplain assigned following me to our unit was killed in an air crash.
Assignment to the 14th Armored Cavalry on the East-West German border (1964-1967) in Fulda, Germany brought about new experiences emotionally with the troops of our command and with the German people. Having been a teenager during World War II meant I had pent up feelings that Germans were our enemy and they caused many American deaths. Among my responsibilities included supervision of three chaplains of different faiths at three geographical military locations and over the athletic and recreation personnel and facilities. During this time I had a number of episodes of fainting from unknown causes. This is in my medical records. Stress with commanders and racial problems in our units, such as racial tensions, were at an all time high. We spent most of our time in maneuvers in the field and at tank training far away from our base and home. My marriage was at a low point during these years. I now feel I made the mistake of putting my career ahead of other basic values that I have been taught. For example, “family first.” This brought on much mental anguish and emotional turmoil.
My first-hand experience with the activities in Vietnam came from the “drawdown” of troop strength in Germany for the war in Vietnam. First hand reports came back to me from officers and enlisted men that were returning to service in Germany from the conflict in Vietnam. It was a despised war that interfered with lives and clouded the future. At any time one might expect to get order into combat in Viet Nam.
Upon reassignment from the 14th ACR I was sent to Fort Hamilton New York to work on the staff the Chaplain School. After this short period I became a student the Advance Course for one year where I was instructed in duties that would be mine in Vietnam the next years. (1968-69). All instruction was centered on the current war in Vietnam.
EVENTS IN COMBAT
From Fort Hamilton, NY I moved my family my wife and four daughters to Willingboro, New Jersey in order to be near Ft. Dix. I was informed by the Chief-of Chaplain’s office that I would be assigned there following my tour of duty in Vietnam. (It did not happen!) Preparation for this experience was both challenging and humbling. I experienced fear, hardship and frustration at the outset of this assignment into combat. 1968 was the Vietnamese lunar New Year, Tet Mau Than.
I was ready for jungle combat, but did not know I would meet it upon my first day of arrival in country. I did a lot of soul searching about this country. Upon arrival at Tan Son Nhut Air base I was met by a captain that I served with in the 14th ACR in Germany. He met my in-coming contract aircraft and whisked me off to his compound for protection from the Vietcong who were attacking that very day. It was a ride in his Jeep that was something like a western movie in that we were running from the V.C. (Like running from the Indians in a movie). I thought that General Westmoreland had declared that the V.C. were being defeated and that “there was light at the end of the tunnel.”
It was difficult circumstances right from the outset! On top of this the captain asked me the question; “Can I be a Christian and still kill?” It was a question I was asked repeatedly. “Love your enemies” Jesus said. (Matt.5: 44.). Defending our liberty and freedom was not on most men’s minds I discovered, but “how quickly can I get out of here, back to the land of the big P.X.?” I began to see the large separation that existed between the military and civilian communities and its ill effects. Most felt no need to make any personal sacrifices. There was a straightforward rivalry between soldiers and civilians. Soldiers were looked upon as less than citizens of this country were. (Upon return to the U.S. at Portland at the airport while in uniform protesters of the war spit upon me). This experience was devastating to me because these people did not know of the sacrifices men were making for their freedom to express their anti-war feelings. This was a cesspool with its smells of death and decay. I knew that from the outset of this experience I was facing daily the possibility of dying, of being killed. It was everywhere and always that I was in danger of loosing my life.
I had been morally and ethically opposed to this war too! The situation was highly political and I believe everyone knew it. I was trained to oppose all combat if at all possible. Peaceful means of resolution was to be sought by means of negotiation in all instances. Reports in the news media have been misleading and I saw this upon arrival in the combat zone. From the beginning I felt that the commitment by Presidents, Kennedy, Johnson, and Nixon were wrong and an attempt to conceal the extent of commitment from the American people was common place. I called this “McNamara’s War.” He was the one who wanted “body count!”
At Cam Ranh Bay I received my orders to go to Danang (in the I Corps Sector, the northernmost area of control by the south). It was a Marine Corps controlled area. Upon arrival at the air base I discovered immediate attacks by rockets. The big cities, like Danang were even more dangerous for the enemy could conceal themselves among the general population and attack at any moment. I could not be off guard for even one moment!
I believed in the ministry of “presence,” so I wanted to be were the troops were, to identify with them and to understand their needs. I wanted to know where they were coming from- to endure their hardships, to experience their dangers, to walk with them as much as possible. It was important to me to be a chaplain to all personnel, in the support troops as well as those going into the jungle at the “forward edge.” I would stay with troops in the jungle for weeks at a time, joining them as they ate “C” rations, slept on the ground without cover, with M-16 and flack vest, and helmet on. This kind of lifestyle took its toll, but it produced closeness with the troops and the men expected to see me there with them. One young soldier comes to mind. He took some of the literature, a Bible I had given him with a camouflage cover on it, and walked away into the jungle. He was a tall fellow and the Vietcong could not help but zero in on him, and he did not return the next day. I learned of his death from a buddy.
During a major battle I conducted a worship service for one of the companies that had been alerted to go in and relieve another battalion. Many troopers turned to tears at that service, knowing not what the next day would hold for them. They were challenged to respond to an invitation to follow Christ and may did that. Did they really mean business, or was it just fear that drove them I wondered?
I was so happy to know that not all men would attend such services for some were needed to guard the perimeter. I set up my combat worship kit, designed just for this conflict, many, many times. It was small enough for me to carry, for on many flights and in many vehicles my assistant could not accompany me. Many miserable days and nights in the field, especially during the rainy season had an impact on my emotions. Many men got jungle fungus on their feet and legs and had to be sent to the hospital to be treated. Even the ponchos were very hot and did not keep out the mold.
While “in the field” I witnessed the agony of men going through being maimed for life by land mines (This was how my very best friend, Chaplain Don F. Bartley was killed). Our men also had to face bamboo spikes (punji stake), trip-wires on mines, machine-gun or AK-47 bullets. These ripped through the flesh and broke bones and caused all one’s blood to spill out. How horrible to see this first hand. How can anyone ever expect to forget such incidents? I remember, especially during Tet period in 1968. So many bodies were so badly broken up, torn to pieces, coming into our mortuary in Danang. This was, to say the least, traumatically damaging to most persons self-esteem and sense of well being.
The everydayness of war for over a year is exhausting. I never knew when the enemy would hit me. Hostile territory was everywhere, especially in the small villages I visited. My assistant covered me with his M-16 rifle as we walked through tribal villages. The enemy seems to be everywhere present on every occasion. The only time for getting away this terror was when I went on R&R to Hawaii for a week to be with my wife, Nancy. Wow, what a time that was!
This war lives on in my mind, just as it was some 50 years ago! I just can’t get it out or free from the experience. It was a new world at that time for me and seems yet so very real today due to the circumstances of the current war situation. Such an ugly and hostile world! Who would desire to live in a hot and stinking jungle with a people who did not know why we were there or what we really wanted? It is no wonder that the troops were always looking forward to getting back to what they called “the real world.” The ”land of the big P.X.”, world of air-conditioning, paved streets, supermarkets, donut shops, running toilets, swimming pools, and the freedom to go where you wanted to when you wanted to with no fear of losing your life To leave everything friendly and familiar, to leave loved ones caused many, including myself to cry.
To know that our loved ones would have to survive without our help and assistance was very, very painful. When my wife, Nancy, got an attack of appendicitis she had to get her neighbors to come in the middle of the night and take care of our children while she drove herself to the Fort Dix Hospital and have her appendix taken out. Our wives also serve who waited for us at home. Our children need a father at home. How very helpless I felt! One day Nancy, my wife, saw an Army Sedan drive down her street, all knew this meant in Willingboro, New Jersey, that someone was going to be notified of a death in Vietnam. On the previous day Nancy had read in the local Newspaper that an Army Chaplain had been killed in Da Nang. She knew I was the only Army Chaplain in Da Nang, so she felt fear it would stop at her house. It passed by and she was relieved. A few days later she got my letter and discovered it was my best chaplain friend, Chaplain Don Bartley who was killed on his way to visit me.
-Date of entry May 4, 2017.
Rev. Dr. Grover G. DeVault
Lancaster, PA 17601